a little self reflection

I'll be the first to admit that I tend to look at life with a critical eye. There is something within me that has always been dissatisfied with the status quo. Sometimes this is a good thing but it sometimes leads me to stick my foot in my mouth.

I think the hardest part for my family is simply putting up with rants about what must seem the same things time and time again. My wife is amazing in the ways she puts up with it and challenges it when she feels the need. The hardest thing for me personally is not letting that critical nature breed bitterness toward people or situations I find myself in.

There are times when I keep this in check, but I definitely struggle with it when I've been traveling overseas. Walking down streets lined with trash and roughly made stalls selling all kinds of goods. Browsing through a market place knowing I am the richest person there despite my meager salary. I think about the people I passed by struggling to make it each day as I proceeded into the local market to buy a Coke and a Twix for a snack.

And so tonight as Sara and I walked to the video store to rent a movie I found my thoughts again drifting toward a critical reflection of my own life. I'm not denying that I do lots of good things to help make a difference in this world. But I know that there is still so much that I take for granted. And there is till so much for me to learn and room for me to grow in life. Thank you God for showing me that I'm not there yet and that I'm still loved where I'm at. Thanks for showing me each day new how much you love me and how far I've come. Thanks for giving me new chances to act and speak in love instead of hate and bitterness.